The Greatest Love of All

So, now that I have your attention, I am sure that you remember the old Whitney Houston song referred to in the title of this post. In case you don’t, let me refresh your memory with a few lines of pertinent lyrics (I have just picked them plum out of the middle of the song):

Because the greatest love of all

Is happening to me

I found the greatest love of all

Inside of me

The Coca-Cola Freestyle machine comes in three
fashion colors.

When I think of my greatest love, I know that these words ring particularly true. You see, my greatest love of all is the Coca-ColaFreestyle machine, and my favorite beverage from said machine, Strawberry FantaZero, will be found inside of me after I drink a 40 ounce cup of it at my local Willy’s Mexicana Grill.

Some people don’t believe in love at first sight, but those people have obviously never heard the story of the Coca-Cola Freestyle machine and me. But, before I tell you our amazing tale of enchantment, allow me to explain what the Coca-Cola Freestyle machine is, for those who are unfamiliar with its magic. It is a touch-screen soda machine featuring many different Coca-Cola products in a cornucopia of flavors. Just some of the beverages it may serve include Coke, Coke Zero, Diet Coke, Sprite, Diet Sprite, Fanta, Fanta Zero, Minute Maid Lemonade, Minute Maid Light Lemonade, Powerade, Dr. Pepper, Diet Dr. Pepper, and just about anything else your little Coca-Cola loving heart desires. But wait! Not only can you get any one of these drinks, but you can also get almost all of them in a variety of flavors. Have you ever tried raspberry Diet Sprite, or Minute Maid strawberry lemonade? Well, you can now!

When I go to my local Willy’s, I go for several reasons, including the food, the casual atmosphere, and the comfort factor (I went to Willy’s a lot in the course of divorcing my ex-husband, and I find it to be a soothing place to go). However, a large part of why I go is because of the allure of the Coca-Cola Freestyle machine. My local Willy’s was one of the first places in the Atlanta area to feature the machine, and when it was introduced there in 2009, it was like someone had plopped Rosie, the robotic maid from the Jetsons right down in the middle of the restaurant or something. People stared at it and oohed and aahed, and pretty much puzzled over how to use it. However, everyone quickly learned that all you have to do is touch the name of the drink you want on the screen, then touch the flavor and a frosty beverage flows into your cup as naturally as—well, as naturally as two people fall in love!

Now, to get back to the magical tale of the first time the Coca-Cola Freestyle machine and I met—it was evening, and getting toward dinnertime. I walked into Willy’s with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named (AKA my ex-husband) and laid eyes on what looked like a spaceship parked next to where the old drink machine sat looking forlorn and lonely. We got our food, and I approached the spaceship, eyes open wide as saucers. As I looked at the screen, a little orange logo and the words “Fanta Zero” gazing hopefully back at me, I knew I’d met the match that would complete me. I tentatively touched the logo, causing the flavor choices to pop up. I spent the next 45 minutes eating and sampling different flavors of Fanta Zero from the Coca-Cola Freestyle machine.

After that initial rush of flavor sampling, I settled into a routine when I visited Willy’s. I started ordering the large-sized drink so I would not have to go back for refills as often, yet I filled my cup an average of three times on each visit to the restaurant. Now, I know some people think it is disgusting to drink soft drinks at all, much less to drink, like, 587 ounces of a soft drink in one restaurant visit, but if I am able to spread the wonder of the Coca-Cola Freestyle machine to even one new person, the vilification will be worth it. My pattern became to fill my cup almost to the top with strawberry Fanta Zero, and then to top it off with some regular cherry Fanta. To this very day I still drink the same flavor combination. I mentioned in this post that when I go to a restaurant, I pick one entrée and then order it every time I visit said restaurant until the end of time, and my pattern of getting drinks at restaurants is no different.

Toddlers have limited fine-motor skills. Also,
sometimes they think bananas are phones.

The only problem with the Coca-Cola Freestyle machine is the people who use it. For example, some people have no idea how to use it, and spend, like five minutes with a line behind them poking and prodding various parts of the machine hoping a beverage will come out from somewhere. While watching them can be amusing, I usually help them to hurry them along so I can get my drink.

Then there are the people who have, like, two and three year-old little kids with them, who decide that the best time to let little Sally or Jimmy press the buttons on the machine is when there are six people waiting in line behind them. Not cool! Let’s all think about the limited fine-motor skills of toddlers here, people! Then there are the kids who have decided to make the world’s most disgusting Suicide by mixing eleventy-billion drink flavors together. Unsurprisingly, once they are done mixing and taste their concoctions, they realize what they made is disgusting and they have to dump it out and start all over—all while I am waiting to get my drink!

There are also the kids who get a little bit of a drink and taste it, and then a little of another flavor and taste it. Okay, they are kids, I get it. Their excuse is that they are young. But one time there was this grown-ass man in his early twenties who proceeded to sample each flavor of Powerade the machine had to offer, then drink half a cup of it each time, all with people waiting behind him. I was shocked and appalled at his behavior!

As you can see, appropriate usage etiquette is very important to me when it comes to the Coca-Cola Freestyle machine. I feel bad when I top off my Fanta Zero with regular Fanta, because I am making people wait, but some of these people seem to think that patrons waiting for drink refills just have all the time in the world! Hmph!

I guess that’s how love is, though. There are the things you love about someone, and the things you don’t like quite so much. If I could just eliminate having to wait in line behind some of these people, the Coca-Cola Freestyle machine would have only positive qualities in my eyes. I guess it is time to start saving money so I can get one for my house one day. If that day ever comes, and you come by to visit and I don’t answer the door, just remember, I am inside with my greatest love of all, enjoying endless flavor combinations and free refills.

Coca-Cola Freestyle image courtesy of http://insideboloco.wordpress.com/

Toddler image courtesy of http://www.goodtoknow.co.uk/

Lyrics from the song "The Greatest Love of All," written by Michael Masser and Linda Creed